If the Antebellum Shoe Fits

Jeb's the serious one.

"All too often we're associated with being anti-everything: anti-immigration, anti-women, anti-gay."-- Jeb Bush

So, right off the bat we know Jeb Bush is a bullshitter, and no, not because he's a Bush. Because we all know that there are plenty of things Republicans are for: war, the drug war, guns, calling globs of cells people, forcing people to live as vegetables, dying in pain, living in pain, and executions, to name just a few. But Bush's point is well taken by a core of GOP moderates who might be willing to compromise on such issues in order to move America slightly further to the right.

So, yeah, Jeb, you're often associated with being anti-a-lot-of-things, but we all know about those fun things you're for, and the majority of Americans are sick of them. And while many Republicans are starting to leave the reservation/plantation/re-education center on issues like gay marriage (now I know why I lost money on Portman as Willard's VP pick), the core of the party--the people who show up and vote in Republican primaries--are just fine with being for a bunch of sick shit most Americans hate, and against things most Americans like.

Poll after poll shows that in blind taste tests, when Americans are shown the issues separated from their political baggage, they're liberals. On wealth equality, for example, Americans would much prefer a much more equitable distribution. On taxes, Americans agree with the Congressional Progressive Caucus. On abortion, Americans are pro-choice. On marijuana, Americans are for medicinal and more and more for outright legalization. Even a large chunk of the right says they're sick of war (whether I believe their bullshit is another question). And gay marriage is quickly becoming all the rage. Seems hippie punching is finally losing it's appeal. Maybe the southern strategy will be next to go?

Jed's bullshit aside, the GOP seems to be anti-a-lot-of-things Americans like, and they seem to be for a bunch of things Americans can't stand. Gerrymandering and bullshitting still manage to get a lot of Republicans elected, but they can only get them so far when they've painted themselves into congressional districts that resemble Mississippi circa 1963, or when you're national candidates have to shake an etch-a-sketch to try to make people forget all the wingnuttery you espoused to get through the frat boy hazing line/road kill cook-off known as the GOP primaries.

GOP to Hire Smarter Teaspoons to Bail Ocean Out of Sinking Lifeboat

The National Republican Senatorial Committee has a plan to cut off the flow of material for Keep Talking Winnguts.

The goal? To avoid what’s become known in GOP circles as "Todd Akin moments." 

"The campaigns that jumped off message not only infected themselves, they infected all the rest of the campaigns," said Rob Collins, the new NRSC executive director, in his first extensive interview on the job. "So in this age of fractured but continuous, three-dimensional communication, we have to constantly plan for that and train for that and build for that."

Let's review the Republican Party Platform:

"Faithful to the 'self-evident' truths enshrined in the Declaration of Independence, we assert the sanctity of human life and affirm that the unborn child has a fundamental individual right to life which cannot be infringed," the draft platform declares. "We support a human life amendment to the Constitution and endorse legislation to make clear that the Fourteenth Amendment's protections apply to unborn children."

Keep writing platforms, wingnuts.

The campaigns that tried to defend the official GOP platform were actually on message--forcing rape victims to give birth to their rapists' babies. They might have shown their ignorance of biology or stretched the bounds of decency with their comments, but that is the result of trying to defend an official party position that is quite hard to defend without resorting to ignorant nonsense that voters find repulsive. It is not the result of jumping "off message."

These new hired guns for the NRSC are actually there to try to get the wingnuts to lie or shut up about the official party platform. I'm skeptical that anyone will succeed at corking these bottles of expanding gas, or lessening the amount of material available to keep talking wingnuts talking.